post no. 105 -- Life as a Wife

My name is Ashley.

My husband is in the US Navy.

As proud as I am of his service, yet I jump at every opportunity to go back to being normal.

I feel a lot of times that we are caught between two worlds: the military, and everyone else. Being stationed on an island with a huge military presence, I feel that a lot of times all Kris and I really have is each other. The more military wives I attempt to befriend, the more isolated I feel. Whether it's the fact that they have children and I don't, don't have a job, don't have the same interests, whatever, it just never seems to blossom into anything other than an acquaintance. 

Kris and I come from a very diverse community, gays, artists, professionals, and republicans, all living together in one small little beach town. There were art shows at the beginning of the month, vintage shops, tattooed musicians, and the crazy umbrella lady. We were at home. And now, despite being smack dab in another beach locale, we're world away from home. 

I feel that since we moved to Hawaii, every time we mention the military, the conversation seems to trail off to a dead end. On one hand we don't have much in common with the military couples, but on the other, we get shut out at the mention of being associated with the military to everyone else. 

Maybe one day we'll find something to do on this island, and someone we can relate to. In the meantime, I'm sick of being pigeon-holed into a category we've never really belonged to. 

"Human tragedies:
We all want to be extraordinary
and we all just want to fit in.
Unfortunately, extraordinary people rarely fit in."
— Sebastyne Young